I woke up this morning and prayed very hard. I am afraid I am becoming jaded and losing my compassion. It isn't just my job, even my personal life seems to be affected. I have caught myself not just thinking unkind things, but saying them.
It seems as I get older I regress to that opinonated, pretentious kid I was in my teens. Is this another symptom of old age? I have to laugh at the old adage -not getting older but growing wiser. I am afraid in my case it may not be so.I feel as though I have taken a giant step back and I don't like the me I am seeing. So I have decided to begin to examine myself more carefully, think VERY hard before I speak, see both sides of a situation, and pray a whole lot!
Of courde now I have also developed "the guilts".Have I hurt or offended anyone? God that is an awful thought! I've been tougher on my customers. Maybe it is necessary but I worry I will seem unfeeling when I really do feel for most of them. Ahhh the dilemmas of life... Of course all this tough love makes me look at my kids and wonder if maybe love wasn't tough enough or too tough? I could go crazier trying to figure this out.
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